Inspiration

I had the week all planned out. Despite feeling poorly (after all, it seems to have been the rule rather than the exception as of late) I knew how my week was going to roll. It included all the normal activities: homeschooling, co-op classes, tutoring, church, chauffeuring kids, etc. as well as a few special activities like a much anticipated breakfast with a friend and a dyslexia evaluation. Yes, I'd been diagnosed with pre-pneumonia that just didn't seem to be improving, no matter what we threw at it. Yes, I was exhausted. Yes, I wasn't quite certain how I was going to pull it all off. But, I had IMPORTANT STUFF to do.

That all changed Monday night.

I had self-diagnosed that in addition to dealing with the remnants of pneumonia, I was also fighting every Longleaf Pine in Northeast Florida which had callously decided to release its pollen into the air and into my allergy sensitive lungs. I called the doctor on Monday, but she didn't have time to see me in the schedule, so I scheduled the appointment for Tuesday after co-op. I never went, however.

I prepared to go to sleep Monday night. I was struggling in my breathing but I brushed my teeth like all was fine in the world. Then I went to bed and found out breathing just didn't work at all lying down. It finally officially scared me.

Minutes later my husband and I were in the van and headed to the hospital. As we drove, my breathing became more and more difficult. I grew more and more scared. Could I be wrong? Could it be a heart attack? Suddenly, all my weekly plans didn't seem so important any more.

The staff at the hospital were obviously better trained at spotting a true emergency than I was as they quickly whisked me back into a room. Drawing a breath in became more and more my intense focus rather than an automatic activity. Concentrate. Inspiration. Expiration. A blood draw was accomplished before I even realized it, and then the questions began:  Did I smoke? (no), Had I had a recent surgery? (no), Had I been on a long car trip or flight? (no). Don't these people understand I'm in the midst of a major allergic reaction? I agonized.

Turns out, my allergies were the last thing I needed to worry about. At some point I had suffered a bilateral pulmonary embolism and could easily have died. This had happened despite having no known risk factors at all. As my head spun and my heart feared, the staff quickly started me on blood thinners and began the detective process. I was incredibly blessed I didn't die.

Alone in the hospital room surrounded with my thoughts, I realized my to-do list wasn't as important as I had originally thought. Instead I turned my thoughts to gratitude- to God for saving my life through the skill of the hospital staff, to my husband who bravely stood beside me and a terrifying diagnosis, and to my friends and family who were supporting me with prayer and fervent well wishes from far away. To love.

I'm so thankful I am still here. I like to think that I would be okay if had returned to God, but I'd be lying if I said that, I embarrassed to admit. The fact is, I feel like I still have so much to do. Maybe God agrees. Earlier in the week I'd been enjoying a rare one-on-one conversation with one of my children as we drove along the highway. "Tomorrow isn't promised to anyone," I reminded him. "Love the people you encounter in your day, every day, despite how you feel. They are God's gift to you." He had been feeling especially challenged by one person in his life, and I understood his struggles. I've been there as well. My brush with death formed that conversation into a crystalline gem for me to keep and remember. My admonition stood for me, too.

I'm grateful I'm still here, wrestling with the massive and mundane questions of life and the universe. I'm thankful to still be a daily presence in my family's lives. I'm mindful things could be different. Love God, love others. That's the way of it. By doing so, we will experience a life well lived, no matter how long.

"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind', and 'Love your neighbor as yourself.'"

Luke 10:27, NIV

Downton Abbey

If you are a devotee of Downton Abbey, I know how you feel now that the show has finished up. I don't normally watch much television these days, but Downton was different. Upstairs and downstairs alike fascinated me. I loved the richly painted characters, the beauty and formality of a time long gone, and the gorgeous scenery. As much as I will miss it, I have a parting souvenir. Jimmy Beans Wool planned a mystery knit-a-long to coincide with the release of each of the first eight final episodes, and I decided to take part. All I knew was that it would be a shawl. Each week a clue was released early Sunday morning, and I sat down to work it out through the week. It was a challenge to stay on top of the work, but in the end I managed to do it. I love the result, too!

Completed and blocked!

The yarn is Lorna's Laces Solemate and was specially dyed for the event. The colorway is called Yorkshire Skies. Kristen Ashbaugh-Helmrich is the designer.

View from the back

Happy to be done!

I love wearing this shawl. I've blocked it in my favorite Eucalan wash, Night Blooming Jasmine, so when I wear it, I catch the subtle fragrance. The shawl sits nicely on my shoulders and will be a welcome garment when Florida air conditioning season hits!

Next on my knitting list is Scottish Ale by Cheryl Beckerich. This is a heavily cabled sweater, and I'm knitting it in Cascade Ecological Wool for my son as a graduation gift. Now that I've started the thing, I'm wondering if I'll actually finish it closer to his college graduation! It's a slog to get through it, but I know in the end he's going to love it. It's a very good thing I'm a process knitter!

It's gonna be a while, folks...

Pennant

I've been knitting again. Actually, in the span of one week's time, I've managed to complete AND block two projects. That's a record for me for sure! The one I want to write about today, though, is Pennant. Designed by Laura Aylor, it's kind of this odd triangulary piece of knitting with holes at one end. It's odd looking but so much fun to knit. The magic happens once the knitting is completed. The holes allow the wearer to change the way it's worn, generating many different looks for the piece.

First day wearing option!

To knit this little beauty, I went on a deep stash diving expedition in my closet and surfaced with two vintage (read, decades old) yarns. The first one my sweet nephew should recognize, as it's the left over yarn from his baby blanket. It's Sirdar Country Style DK and is now retired. The stripe accent was gifted to me by my own sweet little boy who will be heading off to college this fall and is also discontinued. It's Tapestry by Rowan.

Although the yarns aren't exactly alike (one is plied, the other is nearly pencil roving, and one is thicker than the other) I think they worked out really well together.

Laura designed a simple yet engaging pattern, and I know it won't be the last time I work one up. I am thinking it would make a loving prayer shawl gift for someone who could use a lift.

A glimpse of the stripe detailing.

A view of the general shape.

I love the ending of it!

High School Literary Analysis - Next Year!

Barton Blessed!

Meet this cutie:

You would never know it by looking at her, but she is is a super star. You see, my daughter has severe dyslexia. Technically, it's called "double deficit dyslexia," and it has made reading and spelling for her a near impossibility. Remediation for something like this is huge and scary, not to mention time consuming. It's not for the faint of heart. To successfully tackle this beast, we had to pull out the big guns, and I found them through Susan Barton and her fabulous product, Barton Reading and Spelling. We began approximately five years ago. Faithfully, at a minimum of two hours per week and often more, we laboriously moved through all ten levels. There were tears and tantrums. Some of them came from her. Still we persisted, keeping the hope and the vision in sight.

Today was the day. Today she completed all TEN levels of Barton successfully. The child can read and spell. She is bright. She loves books. Her knowledge of science and her dedication to her education humbles me. She teaches me daily. She inspires me. In fact, she inspired me so much, that I got certified myself in Barton.

What's next?

We will continue to read, spell, learn, and love. Her possibilities are limitless. Today we ate at her favorite restaurant. I think that's a good start!

Yep, that's right. Three clean plates!!! All that reading drums up an appetite!

Congratulations, my darling. You are amazing, and you have moved me to advocate for other students who face your mountains. You are a blessing to me. I can't wait to see how you shape this world of ours!

A Walk in the Woods

My husband and I woke early. Neither of us had slept well. The house was still and dark as I prepared coffee and tea, our daily ritual. We sipped while sitting close to each other on the couch, listening to the silence. As we savored our steaming mugs, the sun slipped up above the horizon and darkness began to dispel.

"Let's go on a walk," my husband proposed.

"Sounds lovely," I answered.

And so we left our sleepy home and instead walked into an awakening wilderness, the only humans in the place.

Once the sun decides to rise, nothing can stop her, and before we arrived the disk had slipped the bounds of the earth. Daylight had come and with it all the animals were stirring.

Shelf Fungi on a Fallen Log

In the silence I was studious. Colors appeared more brilliant; movements more pronounced. We enjoyed watching the birds flutter from tree to tree, fresh from their night of rest. I stopped to photograph the shelf fungi from a fallen tree and when we resumed our walk, we spotted a deer in our path.

We looked at it, and it looked at us. Eventually it decided to give us the path for our walk, and we slowly ambled up to where it had stood gazing at us.

A freshly laid hoof print

It was a treat to spend this time with my husband. It was sacred. I'm so glad our sleep was disturbed; it allowed us to see the undisturbed beauty of morning life in the woods.

On the way back home...

Windows Into Next Year

IEW Windows to the World Class for 2016-2017

Do you have a homeschooled high school student that is in need of an English credit for the 2016-2017 school year? I will be hosting a class utilizing IEW's Windows to the World and Teaching the Classics in my home on Friday mornings next year. Space is limited, so if you are interested, please contact me through the blog. The class will run approximately 32 weeks and will focus on literary analysis. Students will read novels, plays, short stories, and poetry throughout the year. Class will be based on Socratic discussion with an emphasis on crafting the literary analysis essay. We are going to have a great time! Come join us!